<img height="1" width="1" style="display:none;" alt="" src="https://ct.pinterest.com/v3/?event=init&tid=2613186133853&pd[em]=&noscript=1" /> Skip to Content

Laugh Out Loud Jokes

Two friends talking:
“Yesterday I went to an auction with my husband”.
“Really? And how much did you get for him?”

Social media helps: a young woman goes to the confessional, but the priest stops her and says “No need my child, I read your Facebook posts…”

Everything is relative.
When you are in bed in the morning and the alarm sounds at 6am, you close your eyes for 5 minutes and when you open them, it is 7am and you’re late.
At work, you finally get to close your eyes for 5 minutes at 1:30pm and when you open them, it is 1:31pm.

Of course I talk to myself from time to time; there are moments when I need expert advice!

The kid asks: Mommy, why did you marry daddy?
Mother to husband: See, even the kid is wondering why.

Kid: Daddy, what is that, “a man”?
Father: It is someone strong, who takes care of the family, who loves and protects everyone.
Kid: Ok, when I grow older I want to be a man like mommy!

The teenage girl to her father: Dad, I love you so much! Let me give you a hug!
Father: Thank you, but you should know that your mother hugged me earlier and took everything.

At the dentist, mother to son: “Son, please open your mouth and say ‘aaaaaa’ so the doctor can remove his fingers!”

Kid in kindergarten: “They should make up their minds! First, they want me to learn how to walk and talk, and now they tell me to sit and shut up!”

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.