What do Black Friday shoppers and the Thanksgiving turkey have in common?
They know what it’s like to be jammed into a small place and stuffed!
Bought a new vacuum on Black Friday.
It sucks!
What flies faster than items off the rack on Black Friday?
Credit card payment slips!
Here’s hoping Black Friday won’t turn into Black and Blue Saturday.
I have decided to exercise in the morning, to wake up faster. Now I am not only sleepy at work, I am also tired.
What are you doing, first thing in the morning?
Go out for lunch.
“Sir, I recommend you shave your head.”
“And will this help with my hair loss?”
“No, but it will help you to get used to it.”
A modern mother’s advice to her 19 years old girl before a date: “If you are not in bed by 11, come home!”
“You should be ashamed,” the father told his son, “When Abraham Lincoln was your age, he used to walk ten miles every day to get to school.”
“Really?” the kid said. “Well, when he was your age, he was president.”
“Papa, are you growing taller all the time?”
“No, my child. Why do you ask?”
“ Cause the top of your head is poking up through your hair.”