One of his first significant cases of a young lawyer was defending a guy who was accused of falling asleep at his post while he was in the army. The young lawyer was all psyched and was delivering what he thought was a well-prepared defense to the judge. The judge interrupted him and told him to turn around and wake up his client.
My boyfriend was really angry when I gave him a box of photos of all his old girlfriends for his birthday. I don’t know why, but he told me he wanted an ex-box!
When my friends talk about the 80s, they think of boom boxes; I had to stop them. That’s just a stereo type.
Back in my day I went to the store with only $1 and came back with 2 bags of chips, 1 carton of milk, and 3 boxes of chocolate.
Now they have cameras.
My family is like a box of cereal. Those who aren’t nuts or fruits are flakes.
Why doesn’t Barbie ever get pregnant ? Because Ken comes in a different box!
Where do astronauts keep their sandwiches ?
In their launch box.
I don’t wanna brag, but I finished a puzzle in under a week and it said 2-4 years on the box.
The young 6 year old girl asks her mother “Mommy, mommy, do you know how long does a lipstick last?” “No, I don’t, but why?” “I know: exactly from the bed to the door”.
At the pharmacy:
“Good morning! Do you have anything against coughing?”
“No, you may cough all you want.”